Saturday, April 24, 2010

Friends


I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about the number of friends that I really have. The number isn't as high as I feel that it should be, and that disappoints me. I'm not talking about acquaintances... I'm talking about true, always there for you, could call in the middle of the night, would bail you out of jail, friends. The type of friends that you know are there for you and always will be there for you.

Currently, I have 541 "friends" on Facebook, but if you were to subtract the number of people that I've actually seen in the past 6 months, or even had a conversation with, in person, online or even via text message, that number would be significantly less. Even less of those people are people that I would consider calling in the middle of the night if I really needed something. Most of them fall into that acquaintances category.

I miss having friends -- people to do things with on the weekends, people to talk to, to get advice from. There are a lot of things that I would love to do, but miss out on, simply because I don't want to do them alone. The majority of the time when I do things, it is with my family. I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with that, but sometimes, you get tired of hanging out with only people that you are related to.

If it wasn't for the Internet, I would be even more lonely than I am right now. People sometimes question if real friendships can be made with people online -- people that you haven't met in real life... I think the answer to that is yes. I have met a lot of people, especially on twitter, that over time have become what I consider to be a friend. There are people that I've never met, that I know if I needed advice on something, I could talk to them about it and they would give me an honest answer.

Tweetups have been great -- they get me out of the house and give me a chance to interact with people. Tupperware has also introduced me to a lot of other consultants. But outside of those two things, I don't do much of anything. I don't know how to meet people. A lot of the people that I know are either married, or have kids. Its like I'm stuck in some post-college, pre-marriage gap, and there don't seem to be a lot of people in the same place that I am, especially living in a college town like Greenville.

I've had close friends in the past, and it seems like I always get taken advantage of. Maybe I am too nice. I pride myself on being a very giving person, but I guess when you give all the time, and never are on the receiving end, you tend to get run over. I feel like I am a good friend, I just wish that I felt like my friendship is something that people appreciate.

Just had to get all of that out there... really not trying to be all "woe is me..." How do you meet people and form true, lasting friendships?

2 comments:

  1. I don't have many true friends like that. I guess I've just become so dependant on family.

    I agree, I have some good friends on here. I'm not sure if that'd be different if we actually knew each other in person or not.

    I look at the number of FB friends and really I don't know why I have that many. I know it's because I'm "friends" with most of the people I went to HS with. But lots of them, I tend to think, "I didn't even know you or we didn't talk to each other in HS". Oh well it's ok though.

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  2. Found your blog through One Porkchop.

    I TOTALLY get what you mean about friends & friendship. I can probably count on one hand the true friends I know I could can't on one hand I could call in the middle of the night with a flat tire. What is funny, is when I was younger the people that I thought I would be friends with forever, or NOT the ones I would call now in the middle of the night.

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