Friday, February 20, 2009

I want to be a Loser...

So, in this whole process of "reinventing" myself, as I like to call it... I have decided that I seriously need to hunker down and lose some weight.

This has been an issue that I have struggled with my entire life. For as long as I can remember, I have been fat. And although I have always been fat, I have had a love - hate relationship with the way that I felt about being fat. Sometimes I would feel like crap, and feel sorry for myself that I was always the "fat chick" and other times, I would be completely comfortable in my body, and let myself believe that it was ok to be fat because I wasn't unhealthy... just overweight.

Now, is one of those times when I don't want to be fat. Before, when I felt this way, I would make up my mind to do something about it... but I would always have very lofty goals... like "I want to lose 100 lbs!" And then, when I felt like I was working hard, and those results didn't come, I'd give up. I've now come to realize that not everyone is going to drop pounds every week in the double digits like some of the contestants on The Biggest Loser. That just isn't reality for a lot of people. Those contestants are losing weight like its their job... because it is... that's all they do while they are on the ranch... eat right and work out.

This time around, I have made up my mind that I am going to set smaller, more attainable goals, and work really hard to meet them. This week, my sister, one of her co-workers, and I started going to Curves. Steph and I have been before, but after we moved, we stopped going. I really like the atmosphere of Curves, because it is all women, and there are ladies there who have a lot of weight to lose, along with ones who are just trying to maintain. Everyone is supportive, and the workout is mentally "easy." I mean, the workout is planned for you, and you can feel each machine working as you are working out.

Curves suggests that you go 3 times a week and workout for at least 30 minutes each visit. I have been 2 days this week, and I'm going in the morning, so that will be my 3 times. They have also started this new "Smart" system that keeps track of how much you are actually working out on each machine and pushes you so that you burn more calories. It customizes the workout for you. We will start that part next week.

I'll be keeping track of how much weight I lose here. My first goal is to lose 25 pounds, and stick to the workout 3 times a week. Maybe keeping up with it here on the blog will be another form of accountability. I've signed up for a year at Curves, so maybe this will actually be the start of a lasting change. Wish me luck!


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